We are approaching two weeks of the “Getting it Back” series and I am absolutely in awe of what God is doing. Things aren’t perfect, and sometimes they aren’t even great, but by taking the time to slow down and take in what is actually happening around me, I notice the Holy Spirit at work in every little detail of my life. I don’t understand everything that is happening but I know that things are indeed happening.
I spent most of the day at home with my family. Even once hubby finally made it home from work, he went right to sleep! I had made plans for the evening, as I’m committed to doing and was about ready to start getting things in order so that I could be leaving my home when I told my friend that I would. If you’re a parent to even ONE child you know that they care nothing about your plans. You can make them weeks in advance, and the day of something will happen concerning them, causing you to make adjustments to your plans. Well, my baby girl, sweet, spoiled angel that she is, decided to help me “adjust” this evening. She fussed and whined, and she cried and hollered. I fed her, changed her, and fed her again. Mind you, the men in the house are napping, and one of those men, her daddy, was right on the couch. I knew he was tired and I knew he needed the peace and quiet so that he could rest. You can imagine how I was trying to do everything in my power to get her to settle down and relax so that I could get myself together and take care of dinner before I left the house. She wasn’t having any of it. I laid her down, and she hollered and pulled herself up. Yea, she’s at that age now and I’m not really able to process it because it’s happening far too fast! At some point her daddy ended his nap and took over with her. Of course she was giddy and chatty with him! Needless to say, I did manage to make it out of the house before 9pm. That’s the best I could do LOL.
Once I finally made it to my friend’s house, myself, my two friends (the other one met us at the friend’s house), her daughter and her daughter’s two friends piled up in my mom car and headed to Dave and Buster’s so that her daughter could enjoy an evening out with her friends for her 11th birthday. Of course we sat and ate and talked while they had a good time playing games and being kids. I began to wonder what kinds of things my own children would be interested in at the ages of 10 and 11 and realized that time would be here before I know it. Then it hit me. I’ll be 37 years old at that time. I wonder what God will be doing in my life by then? Will I still be steadfast in my faith? Will my marriage still be standing strong? Will I be walking in my calling and impacting the lives of people around me with the message of Jesus? What will my relationships look like? Will the people I’m sitting across the table from still be apart of my life. I sure hoped so. I’m sitting here thinking through some of these questions, and realize I am drifting out of the moment. I remember checking my phone several times to make sure my husband hadn’t reached out and I missed the call or text. Now all of this is happening while I’m away from home, which I decided to do ON PURPOSE! Can you believe it?
Here I am telling you how serious I am about growing and maturing in the natural as well as the spiritual, and yet I’m unable to enjoy an evening out without checking my phone and wondering if my loved ones at home were okay. That moment made me realize, even more, how necessary this journey was. God was trying to push me onward, and I was still trying to cling to what makes me feel in control and what I know. God is so much bigger than our safety net and our box of comfort. He is eager for us to reach new heights in him and to become all that we can be for sake of his glory. What is it that we are clinging to? What after thoughts are keeping us from pursuing those things that we know God has called us to? What are you afraid of and what are you waiting for? Today, trust that if God sends you somewhere, he will make provision for the journey, and he will take care of you every step of the way. Let go of the security blanket and trust God! He’s got you!