This journey is almost a month old already! I remember when I made the decision to write about what God was taking me through in life at this moment, and I remember being a bit nervous, and definitely on the fence about it. Then I began to think about how many times I had looking for the testimony of men and women just like me, who were facing their own struggles and hardships in life. JUST LIKE ME! Even if I didn’t find the clarity that I was looking for at the time, I always felt a little better knowing that someone else was in the trenches too! For me, that reason is what I cling to when I wonder if I should stop talking about the things I discuss in my posts. Instead of trying to be just enough of this or not too much of that, I made the decision to be myself, speak from my heart, and blog the way I feel lead. I want to be the someone in the trenches to someone who may also be looking for hope to cling to.
A lot has taken place in over the last month of this journey. I started a blog, something I said years ago that I would do just because I enjoyed writing and thought I had something to say worth sharing. I’m so glad I waited! I had not gone through enough at the time to really be able to add anything to anyone’s life aside from some semblance of an extended Facebook post! God used and is using everything that I’ve ever been through to create a platform for me to reach anybody that stumbles across this blog. And I do mean stumble because I do not have a very heavy internet presence. So if you come across this blog, trust that God sent you! I write with the hopes that someone will come to know Jesus Christ in a real and personal way. I am absolutely nothing without Him. There would be no journey to document with Jesus, and I most certainly wouldn’t want to tell anyone anything. It’s taken lots of prayer and plenty of fighting, but I haven’t quit and I don’t plan on quitting.
I just want to say that you are special. I don’t have any excited news to share with about my personal life. The most exciting thing I could ever tell you is that Jesus loves you more than you can imagine. He simply asks that we trust what he sees in us and follow him. I trust that God has entrusted me with tis battle because he believes in me. I dare say he thinks I’m qualified to be a billboard for his glory. I know I’m not, but as I’ve heard some awesome brothers and sisters in Christ share in church the last weeks, “God doesn’t call the qualified. He qualifies the called.” All my best is puny compared to God and his might. I keep writing for that reason. Everything around me is a hot mess, and while I’m still worried about getting things together because I want people to be blessed, God is telling me to pack up my hot mess and bring it because He can work with whatever I have going on. Just like I was reminded of this truth, I want to remind of the same truth. You don’t have to be the picture of perfection in order for God to use you. The Bible says our goodness is about as good as a bunch of dirty rags compared to God Almighty” (Isaiah 64:6)! Even we tried to keep it halfway together it wouldn’t be enough!
So go ahead, fall apart! Completely lose it and let everybody see how crazy you are. God says that okay because “he uses the foolish things of the world to confound the wise” (1 Corinthians 4:27). That’s pretty awesome because I don’t know about you, but I fit into that “foolish thing” category! I’m not always at my best, and I’m certainly not always locking away my worst to make sure the people who I love don’t get hurt, but God says he can use me still. How humbling it is to know that my junk could literally be turned into treasure that points someone else to Jesus. If He can use me and my mess, than I trust and believe He can do even bigger and better in you. Keeping walking it out people! God has your back and there’s nothing you can do about it!